28 November 2000
Customer Standards Dept.
Ryanair
Dublin
Ireland
Dear Sir/Madam
FLIGHTS 974 AND 975 STANSTED to GENOA RTN
There is a lot of talk in the Press these days about “Harmonisation”.
Its harmonisation this, harmonisation that. Harmonisation
of economic variables for participating currencies in the
euro, harmonisation of consumer standards etc etc.
There has also been a lot of talk in the media recently about
the impact blood can have on customer welfare in the context
of international air travel. Mostly this discussion has centred
around the blood “clotting” and occasioning illness,
even death. I guess there can be nothing worse for customer
welfare than death.
There is another peril involving blood and air travel, however,
which has hitherto received little coverage in the media but
which can have a similarly deleterious impact on consumer
service. This particular danger involves something diametrically
opposed to clotting … flowing. And not flowing on an
individual basis; I am talking here about harmonised flow.
It is a well known fact that when a group of women are together
for a period (I choose these words quite deliberately), they
menstruate. And when they menstruate, they remonstrate. I
select as my evidence to back up this statement the contrasting
behaviour of the air stewards on the flights to and from Genoa
this weekend past.
On flight 974 from Stansted to Genoa, the stewards were not
women (they were not quite men either, but that is irrelevant
for present purposes). The mood was jocular, even gay. We
had a good time.
On flight 975 back to Stansted the ambience was quite the
opposite. After takeoff there was a delay of some 45 minutes
before the toilets were available for public use. I believe
that all personal lubrication changes should be conducted
as part of the pre-flight check, not when paying customers
seek simple relief. The steward had “lost their audience”
and the plot. Simple matters such as passengers leaving their
seats with drinks in hand and blocking the drinks trolley
in the aisle were greeted not with a smile, fake punch on
the shoulder and cry of “you crazy kiwi guys”.
At one stage one of the stewards going by the name of Rita
(as in “in a dark alley I wouldn’t want to meet
her”) actually barked “Seats!!”. I kid you
not. She barked. Like a dog.
As a result of this the passengers experienced considerable
distress and suffering. It was no surprise that at the end
of the flight when one of the stewards tried to get the attention
of a departing passenger to get his phone number, he stormed
off without looking back no matter how many times she yelled
“Excuse me”.
How can this be averted? I believe that passengers should
be forewarned of the potential of this phenomena reoccurring.
The website should be amended to show the particular dates
on the timetable when the cycle is likely to strike (my knowledge
of these matters is rudimentary, but I do recall the incidence
of the phenomena can be predicted with startling accuracy
and regularity). Perhaps the individual flights could be marked
as “Red Flights”. These are just my suggestions.
I am sure you will have many of your own.
I suppose the motto is this: even though you think you are
getting charming Irish females on these budget airlines, there
are often strings attached.
Yours sincerely
A. Passenger.
|
